Is This London’s Best Child-Friendly Afternoon Tea?

Review: Peter Pan Afternoon Tea At Aqua Shard

Without any insult intended towards children – after all, for the first few years of his life, your author was one – how many can reasonably be expected to sit still in a restaurant, let alone at a luxury dining experience? Of course, exceptions exist, but frequently one glances across an eatery and sees scores of children placated by tablets and smartphones – if Marx called religion the opiate of the masses, then perhaps Instagram Reels is the opiate of the six-year-old whose parents just want to have a nice dinner.

This is the struggle, I imagine, for anybody planning a luxury afternoon tea with a family audience in mind. Bridging the gap between an experience that is rewarding and sophisticated for adults, and one that is exciting and fun for children, is quite the challenge.

It’s a challenge that Aqua Shard’s Peter Pan Afternoon Tea not only rises to, but makes look easy. I can only imagine the amount of effort and planning that went into making this experience both as lively and magical as J.M. Barrie’s original novel, without ever compromising on being as refined, elegant and decadent as a luxury culinary experience designed with a purely adult audience in mind. Everything from the menu to the service, to even the seating, was a masterful exercise in gleeful whimsy without ever veering into that dreaded territory of tackiness or kitsch.

A glimpse at the Jolly Roger – crewed by desserts galore

Standing before the Shard can be daunting. In order to even enter the skyscraper one first has to make their way through security, before embarking on a swift (and impressively quiet) elevator ride to the 31st floor, where Aqua Shard is located. But any trepidation is instantly replaced with awe once one enters the restaurant; a colossal open plan space with floor-to-ceiling windows and gentle synth-y strings humming pleasantly in the background.

It should be noted that all the Peter Pan Afternoon Tea seats I could spot were situated right by these windows. With jaw-dropping panoramic views of the central London skyline, it’s difficult to imagine anybody (child or adult) not being entranced by this spectacle. My friend and I were greeted with a glass of champagne each, but fear not teetotalers: a selection of non alcoholic beverages is also available, including possibly the finest oat flat white I’ve tasted in my life. No chance of one’s son or daughter burning their mouth at this experience.

Our waiter then walked us through the menu, playfully inscribed on a mock treasure-map displaying Neverland itself. You’ll be glad to know that one can take this menu home as a free souvenir of the experience.

The menu is set: this should not be seen as a criticism, but rather a boon. Too often, one will order food for one’s child only to be faced with the dreaded ‘I don’t like it’ – not an issue when one is presented with such a variety of set dishes. This ranges from from the truly avant-garde to exciting spins on classic finger-food, whether you’re feeling adventurous or you’re a bit of a picky eater, there’s something here for everyone.

It’s here I shall briefly expand upon my choice of guest for the tea, henceforth dubbed ‘Mr X’ to preserve his anonymity (and, perhaps, his dignity). I mention him because Mr X is a man whose idea of a perfect meal is breaded turkey dinosaurs and fries. He is trepidatious around spaghetti bolognaise, fearing it may be too spicy for him. Poorly sourced rumour informs me that he once asked for a children’s menu at the Ritz. In short, he has the palette of your average five-year-old, so whilst I attacked the ‘Mushroom Tart’ (with white truffle puree), he immediately bee-lined for the ‘Little Bird’: essentially an egg and cress sandwich.

Or so he thought. Aqua Shard cunningly added just the slightest hint of truffle to what would otherwise be an – admittedly perfectly crafted – conventional piece of finger-food. Mr X confessed to me that he was thoroughly impressed; this, then, is where the Peter Pan Afternoon Tea really excels. It takes staple favourites of children nationwide (egg sandwiches; sausage rolls; chocolate sponge), and elevates them into luxury culinary achievements without ever losing sight of what makes them such stalwarts of kids’ parties.

Aqua Shard’s Peter Pan Afternoon Tea offers exciting gourmet twists on finger-food classics

Next came the ‘Sweet Treats’, which arrived on a magnificent facsimile of the Jolly Roger itself. A replica pirate ship crewed by confections, scones and jams, our waiter declared that he had a ‘magic trick’ in store for us: pouring the contents of a teapot into the heart of the ship, the vessel miraculously produced sheets of sparkling smoke and dry ice. Again, that current running throughout the experience: fun for kids, but never tacky for parents.

The desserts, by the way, were excellent. The ‘Secret Entrance’ was the standout, a decadent dark chocolate sponge and mousse perfectly paired with tart cherry jam. ‘Peter Pan’s Hat’, that being, choux pastry, lemon curd, Chantilly and buttercream, is also not to be missed. And hidden in a little treasure chest at the back of the boat: a selection of gummy crocodiles! And of course, the scones, jam and cream itself – traditionalists will be thrilled to know that here Aqua Shard adopts an ‘if it ain’t broke, don’t fix it attitude’. With generous helpings of cream, raspberry and apricot jam with top ups available upon request, this might be the highlight of the meal. Aqua Shard here demonstrates that, for all its experimental additions to classic dishes, it isn’t afraid to serve its centrepiece without twists or affectations. This is nothing more and nothing less than great scones and jam prepared by experts at afternoon tea.

In conclusion: there’s something for everyone. If you’re a bit of an epicurean, you’ll be more than satisfied with the dishes, but children (or adults!) who have more conservative palettes will likewise find much to love in the food and drink available. And the charming Neverland theme wraps the entire experience in a proverbial bow – Aqua Shard’s Peter Pan Afternoon Tea is not to be missed for young and old alike.

Just some of the delicious sweet treats on offer at Peter Pan Afternoon Tea

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aquashard.co.uk